I always considered myself to be big-hearted and so found myself dating a lot of dorks. I figured I could overlook a little eccentricity or lack of finesse. A crooked tie, saddle shoes, and hobbies like coin-collecting and bee-keeping were somewhat cute. However, once it got down to dates that were based on 2 for 1 dinner coupons and weekend getways that included a timeshare tour, I figured collecting was an euphemism for a deep, anal retentive need to spend as little as possible. Unfortunately, I found my self moving on to dingos. (more to come)
SMC
Monday, March 23, 2009
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Can't wait to hear about Dingos next SMC. I unfortunately dated a Dingo of the worst kind. They are very cunning. They can smell your weakness and know how to exploit it in a very charismatic way. Watch out for the Dingo who says he's Austrailian, because he lies about his age, family, where he lives, who he talks to on the phone etc. All you have to do is look in the storage room and you'll likely find all his archived information on himself and others. These are the worst predators because they are typically sociopathic.
ReplyDeleteS
Dingos work from instinct. They need to create a charismatic persona that will entrance and entrap you. They hide their real personalities until they seep out in psychopathologies like trying to convince you that threesomes are a way of expanding your sexuality. They get you started upstairs and then leave to see if the maid wants to join in. You hear a slap, you get dressed, it's over.
ReplyDeleteDingos will eat your heart out, given a chance. I'm an old broad myself remembering the 60's, when in the guise of free love and spirituality, men would try anything to get you to do anything except really connect.
ReplyDeleteWell used
If you're going to San Francisco . . . no wonder you're well-used. We get what we put out in the universe.
ReplyDeleteMove on
A lot of Dingos I have dated or met have had money - which is an attraction for a lot of women. It can wear thin when they are of little substance - unless they are a good lover, in which case will only last for so long. Let's face it, we want to meet our match, whether a dork, a current dog, former dog but if you are entertaining a Dingo - make sure he is rehabilitated and has a pattern of proving that. Meet his family and friends; his colleagues, maybe his ex-wife if he has one : ))
ReplyDeleteBeen Around
Dear Been Around:
ReplyDeleteI agree on all that! I dated a guy once who I thought was a bit of a dork. He dressed like John Travolta from Staying Alive (I think that's what the movie is called), and it didn't fit in with the era. I over-looked it because he was handsome; charismatic; smelled good and was very sweet to me. Then over the 18 month relationship - he was more and more controlling. In this case he acted as a complete Dog for the most part UNTIL I had to get a restraining order because he became physically abusive and followed me to work everyday and watched my every move (NO, he didn't have a real job!; then the last straw was when he broke into my apartment and held a knife to my throat - THEN i punched him and he ran. At this stage this is clearly a Dingo. I called the cops and they warned him not to come near me. I dated the cop who was HOT (well, c'mon, what did you expect) - but he too was a dog really. 10 years after dumping that creep who was abusive, I saw him driving down the street in a FIAT with an old dirty mattress strapped to his card that could harldy drive for tipping over and spouting out fumes and he (unfortunately for these little girls) he had 2 toddlers in the car. Not 2 years after that I went to a Mexican restaurant for a girlfriends birthday party and who is our server with a Sombrero and all the gear on - yup, him! So - back to being a dork was he!!!
AB
I can relate to dating many dorks in my lifetime with a few Dingos mixed in. Although, my favorite memory of a dork (though you really can say we actually dated) was when I was 24 years old and had met a nice Italian man online, who was 28 at the time. We chatted for a few weeks, and then one day while at work, first the florist arrived with 2 dozen of the most beautiful red roses and an hour later the FedEx man showed up with a large Styrofoam box....both deliveries were for me, imagine my surprise.... I put the beautiful roses on my work station ,and proceeded to open the box as curiosity was definitely pretty high up there. I had no idea of what to expect... So after taking the lid off, imagine my utter surprise when upon reaching my hand into the box something moved against it... there were, 2 very large LIVE main lobsters moving in the bottom of the box. The next week, same day (It was always on Monday's) the florist arrived with another 2 dozen beautiful roses and the FedEx man arrived as well to deliver another package. This time my package contained a beautiful alabaster plate and mother of pearl spoon, and in the small gift basket? Beluga Caviar and Belgium Chocolates. This continued for almost 2 months and it was always fun to try and guess what might arrive that week. It was always 2 dozen roses and a fedex delivery. I received, in addition to the items already mentioned, a 2 lb. filet of smoked salmon, an ebony and ivory cheesecake, more Belgium chocolate than I could possibly eat and a book depicting the area of Italy in which he lived and a non-circulated Lira.... He offered to pay my way to Italy, First Class. But my being 24, and have never met him in person (all of our correspondence was via email) I informed him that the only way in which I would travel to Italy to meet him would be Chaperoned. I think I finally offended him, and it didn't help when I asked that he not send me any more live seafood nor fish. A man with a true grasp of how to court a woman definitely... and I have a wonderful little memory of the dork that could have been.
ReplyDeleteLS
LS,
ReplyDeleteYour beautiful story is an example of why it is sometimes better to have a wonderful memory than to spoil it with discovering he was a dork, or even worse, a dingo.
SMC
What about these women these guys who are apparently Dorks, Dogs or Dingos? Are these women stupid, naive, desperate, low sel-esteem, etc......?????
ReplyDeleteDevils Advocate
I meant to ask - why are these women dating these guys? What's with the women????
ReplyDeleteAre all guys like this? I don't think so.... Devils Advocate
Hi Devils Advocate:
ReplyDeleteI understand your question and don't think as a woman I haven't asked myself this question many times. Having said that; in my life I have MANY men (perhaps a lover, guy I dated for a long time, a family member even a girlfriend) say to me "let your guard down and trust". So I did. SOmetimes when you do you find yourself and you find love (as I FINALLY HAVE). But for 20 years of trying previous to that, and with that advice of "let your guard down" - sorry, it didn't work. Often the RESULT of bad relationships were low self-esteem, walked into the relationship knowing it was wrong; gut feel that I didn't follow; knew the guys history and thought "I would be different". So YES, to your point these are good questions. I think the premise of the book these ladies are trying to have or achieve is that we reflect on some things in our past and tell the story so that either we can move on, laugh about it or whatever. Many of us have kids now (daughters) and perhaps there are lessons to be taught. I appreciated your guts (assuming your a guy) to ask the question that maybe a lot of women want to ask as well.
S. Wright
Dear Devil's Advocate,
ReplyDeleteWe are planning a sequel called, "Bitches, Broads, and Bimbos" -- equal time. Most of us are lonely travellers and we try to connect with people. Often it doesn't work out. Often we internalize it and wonder what's wrong with us. I know I did.
I have found since I started to talk about this in a light-hearted way, some of the angst has dissolved. It's way cheaper than therapy.
S. Rong
Devil's advocate: Tell us about the exception.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the exception doesn't exist??? I don't know. Maybe he is rehabilitated or sees himself in a whole new light or a whole different light than any of these categories. I have probably been labelled by women is all 3 of your categories and have "distinguishing marks". You say you are writing a sequel - well, I guess that's fair to the guys who want to tell their side of the story.
ReplyDeleteDevils Advocate
I just came on line and I'm reading the Devils Advocate feedback. He (I presume) seems open enough to hearing what us women have to say. That's cool! I think some of the guys I know and maybe even my husband might not want to hear about only 3 categories of men. I think he might think that's shallow, HOWEVER, I have never known a man (not even my fantastic husband who I love and respect) would put any women in some pedestal or angelic - halo like category. He hasn't ever called me any bad names but I guarantee he would have loved to call me a bitch many times along-with bimbo; and let's face it - for anyone of my friends and family out there, they might have called me that too - it takes more than that to offend me. So my feedback is that it's all for fun and learning like the writers suggest. I have to go back to my thinking mode and imagine myself at a girls party complaining about past relationships or men in general. I'm sure I will have a few stories to share!
ReplyDeleteS. Wright